right now, right here

my life sucks! and i can't sleep

Life sucks in more ways then i can count

for some reason -- i'm watching the baby channel tonight as punsihment!

...i think, therefore...................

excerpts from a spam email (r.warren)

"Be careful how you think; your life is shaped by your thoughts" (Proverbs 4:23 GNT)

Long before psychology came around, God said your thoughts determine your feelings and your feelings determine your actions. If you want to change your life, you've got to control the way you think.

Our minds are really an amazing creation. It would take a computer the size of a small city just to carry out the basic functions of your brain. Your brain contains over one hundred billion nerve cells. Each individual cell is connected with ten thousand other neurons.

In addition, you're constantly talking to yourself--all the time. Your mind is talking to you! You're talking to yourself right now. Research indicates that most people speak at a rate of 150 to 200 words per minute, but the mind can listen to about 500-600 words a minute.

In fact, our internal dialogue--the conversation we have with ourselves--is at a rate of 1,300 words per minute. How? Because our mind sees in pictures, and you can see a thought in a nano-second!

The problem is a lot of us are like Job, who says, "Everything I say seems to condemn me" (Job 9:20 GN). He is saying, in effect, "Everything I say puts me down." If you are typical to the human race, you are your own worst critic.

We're always putting ourselves down. We walk into a room smiling, but inside we're thinking, "I’m fat. I'm dumb. I'm ugly. And I'm always late!"

How do you eliminate negative self-talk so you can become a more confident person?

What does SO DONE mean?
• I don’t want any more human contact or stimulus activity
• I’m physically/emotionally exhausted
• I wished I didn’t feel so many responsibilities
• I’m tired of pretending to be what people want me to be
• I hate my life, life sucks, life is so unfair (whine)
• I just want the day to be over
• If it’s over, I can’t hit anymore
• I want to crawl into the closet and hide
• I want to escape into another place
• I can’t stand one more thing to have to fix
• I can’t do anything right and it’s just one more failure
• It’s over, finished, through, desiring an end, waiting for the next hell to begin
• I’ve arrived/concluded failure/defeat
• Where is God in all this?

OFFICE Management 101

Rule Number One:
Never complain about what you permit.


I WANT TO GO HOME AND STAY UNDER THE COVERS FOR 40 YEARS!!!

tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap

the sound of water drops on my glasses as i try to run from my world -- drowning in the drama --- why is there alwasy drama? it must be me because it follows me like a lost puppy dog......................................i am so done for now!!!!!!!!!

SOOIOOO DONE

I'm hiding under the covers for the next 24 hours

Duck Duck Duck Duck GOOSE!

I'm so stressed out with drama - keeping everyone else's duck in a row while mine are drowning because I don't know Whatelse to do!! Where is God in all this madness?

The topic to night was grace. Somehow it turned into what would the present "me" tell the old/past "me" how God will get you through the rough time. The PAST "me" would be pissed off at the present "me" for the lack of faith? Hope? I could see past me shaking present me by the shoulders saying "wake up! What the hell are you doing!!"

I'm not very greatful about much! I'm tired. Tomorrow is full of more disappointments. The past, reminders of failure. No one understand that but the present "me". What about the future "me"? Is there a future "me"?

so evil and so bad
dissapointment
bitterness
disassocation
mad
angry
rage

i hate this life and i'm ready for the next hell to start -- i want off this roller coaster
a prick from a thorn is better then a cruelity of words that cut to the heart.