As we flip around the channels we come across a british station on their famous hauntings...but you know it was more hype with no real facts or proof...all subjective. Do I believe in hauntings? I don't think there are ghosts so to say but I wonder about lingering souls. Is that part of thier hell if they didn't make it to heaven? I know from what I read in the bibile, there is a spiritual warfare going on around us we just can't see it. So yes, if I believe in angels then I believe in demons...
Depression: Is that a battlefield and I'm just one of the players? How many angels are on myside...even when I'm so ready to give up. There have been soo many times when I just wanted not be around or exisit...how do you not exist...can that be a choice each day to live or just get through the day. The gray areas are so blah...I still like the black or white maybe that's part of my problem. I don't see what's so wrong about it. I realize it's part of my perception that makes it wrong. What I first believe isn't always the real reality.
Medication: medical or mental -- does one help the other or hinder? Since I've been more supervised over taking my meds correctly...I guess they have helped. At least I can say there are good moments in each day as opposed to the day just sucked!
So that brings me back to my title...hauntings. I think I am haunted by what I thought I was, what I think I should be, and where I'm at now. No matter how many pills or counseling I do will ever fill the emptyness. Is that my reality?
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